The One Ring called
me once, then twice
into the dark.
My hand offends
me, not my eyes.
Bring me the axe.
written for DversePoets
27 Thursday Dec 2012
Posted Poetry
inThe One Ring called
me once, then twice
into the dark.
My hand offends
me, not my eyes.
Bring me the axe.
written for DversePoets
better to lose the hand than let it corrupt you fully…though rather brutal when taken literally….smiles. that one ring can be tempting…just finished LOTR with my oldest son…
Ah, but if the eyes don’t offend, and only two dark intrusions..one current…what then?
oh heck yes…i love lord of the rings..and there are things that can control us immensely..
aaaah LOTR – i’ve been reading it every year since i was 12 years old. very nice!
Yeah ! Fun.
Not your style at all — great experimentation.
Are you familiar with the story of what Bodhidharma did to himself in the cave? Read here about the Daruma Doll — it is “fun”.
His eyelids offended him.
Your script looks like some Devanagari script (itself from Brahmi) minus the rekha (the line on top) and the vowels (the hoops above) are going the wrong direction. Well you’v got a Greek lambda in there too.
— Ahhhhhhh, then I saw your tag for “Tengwar” — it is Tolkien’s artificial script (not read him or seen the movies). And thus the “Ring”.
So this IS consistent with your style — hidden allusions that only the initiated will understand. You might enjoy my replies to readers on my site.
Omniglot has a great blurb on this “script” — you may enjoy. And here is the version for English usage.
And now I see that your handwriting is just a repeat of your poem but written in Tengwar. Darn, I was hoping for a secret poem after all this work! 🙂
But in your poem, is the “ring” Tolkien’s ring stuff, or for you, the marriage ring?
Very cool approach and beautiful Tengwar.
Nice!! 🙂
Oh my gosh, I love this. That last stanza. Wow. Excellent. I’m reading it over and over.
You know, I didn’t catch the Lord of the Rings reference until I did an online search. I initially read it as if “The One Ring” were God calling you in the dark (as He did with Samuel in the Bible). But before you can answer God’s call, you must “chop off” the offending parts of yourself.
“My hand offends
me, not my eyes.” … Another way to read this (because of your line break) is “My hand offends me [but it does] not [offend] my eyes.” Whatever that means. 🙂
One Ring might also refer to a wedding ring and some sort of violation. Or it could refer to seeing a woman as “The One” who really isn’t a good choice for you, yet you followed her into the dark.
Excellent piece. I love short poetry that allows my imagination to run wild.
Could it be the offending eye which likes not the hand ? Anyway, I beg you not to chop if off:)